i'm tired of being sad, and i'm tired of being around sad people. yes, i have some screwed up relationships, and yes, its all been piling on top of me all at once... but, i am still so much better off than millions of other people in the world.
I read a GREAT quote, and i don't have it on me, but it pretty much said that being others centered is the cure for any sickness...depression, heart break, etc. when you are pouring yourself out, you become focused on the needs of others, and their hurts, and slowly you begin to heal....you can't focus on two things at once!
Thats so true. I want to pour my life out, i want to influence others. I'm going to start trying to be involved in community programs, I applied for Big Brother Big Sister, I'm going to run in the Race for the Cure, and I'm looking at other things, like Habitat for Humanity.
I've been talking to a friend about opportunities at her church as well, so we'll see how that pans out. If you have any other suggestions for me, they would be much appreciated :)
you're gone, im here. you said forever. and we laughed we cried and we never thought that forever would end.
we dedicated songs to each other took silly pictures whispered secrets in the dark till we fell asleep. you were my best friend my confidante. the one person i knew i could rely on. the one person that would be always be there for me the one person who would love me no matter what.
or so i thought. but you're gone and im here. i have questions that will never be answered but there is one question that will always hang over my head why did you stop being my friend? i don't like thinking about the answer it hurts too much, and sometimes, i just pretend the truth is altogether something different. but i will always know... i wasn't enough. i was too human. i fell and you didnt want a fallen person for a friend. i changed... who knew that thought that 'forever' had 'or until you change' silently, invisibly attached.
'you don't get to call me a whore! when i met you, i thought i had met the person i would spend the rest of my life with. i was done. so all the boys, and all the bars, and all the obvious daddy issues...who cared? because I was done. you left me! you chose addison! i'm all glued back together now. i make no apologies for how i chose to repair what you broke. you don't get to call me a whore!'
singing at the top of my lungs.
exploring new cities.
beauty in the small things.
blaring the music.
a fine frenzy.
love so wonderful it makes you hurt.
all things lovely.